Mixed UP

Okay here goes,

you know how i jus continue bitching about life and all...well, now i'm kinda in a MIX UP! Dun exactly know how i feel...Everyone's leaving, so me leaving is like some sort of an initiation...Jan's in New Zealand, Rel's in Belgium, Ricky got the pilot thingie and sud be off to NS by May, Rome's got his Police Academy letter, Nice has left (sigh of relieve)...and so on...I'll be leaving in a day or two and i'm not even half way thru packing...

Got the main stuff...now all that's left are the small things...It weird to say this but i'm scared as hell about being on my own, alone in a foreign land...hiaz...so i'm happy that i'll get to see the U.S. of A and all but i'm leaving so much behind...and have already left so much here...there are 3 main things that are affecting me right now and somehow it seems like everything...Physically going down the drain...Mentally haven't been working the brain and Emotionally very unstable...Tots of what may or will happen when i leave scares me...

I know this is for the best and all but am i giving up too much? Will i be giving up at all? In about 2 yrs, lots wud have changed and i really hope, wish, pray, dream that it will all be for the better...More of my friends will get married, hopefully no one passes away, roads wud have changed, some may meet, others will diverge...everyone will be older...and hopefully wiser...Bitchiness will hopefully be eradicated...Fats extinct, ex-lovers, happy...you know all the good stuff....But what if?

So you see as much as i am prepared to go, a huge bulk of me is rooted here and the day i leave will be the day many of the roots holding me here will be torn away...You know what I really LOVE my family and maybe i dun say this enough...or maybe at all...but I really love you guys...Family, friends and even my enemies...

I LOVE U ALL!!

JERMZ WILL BE DEPARTING SINGAPORE FOR PENSACOLA ON THE 5TH APRIL 2005 at 1600Hrs!

sobz!